Is It a Good Idea to Have Children at Your Wedding?

On the face of it, chil­dren and wed­dings don’t really mix. Expect­ing a small per­son to remain still and quiet, even for a rel­a­tively short cer­e­mony, is often ask­ing a touch much.

And, of course, there are many peo­ple who believe that wed­dings should be adults-only affairs. How­ever, if you decide to have a kid-free cer­e­mony, there is a good chance that at least some of your guests will be unhappy with your choice. So, what do you do? Well, first, weigh up the pros and cons of hav­ing chil­dren at your wedding.

What Kind of Cer­e­mony Are You Planning?

If you intend to have a fairly low-key, relaxed affair, it’s a much more kid-friendly zone. On the other hand, a church cer­e­mony, or oth­er­wise more for­mal event, could lead to scream­ing and tantrum issues.

Bear in mind; if you want chil­dren to be a part of the cer­e­mony, as page boys, ring bear­ers, or flower girls, then you can’t really ask your guests to leave their lit­tle ‘uns at home. You could try, of course, but the request is unlikely to sit well.

Eti­quette, Wed­dings, and Children

Whether you decide to have a child-friendly or child-free wed­ding, there are some basic rules of eti­quette involved.

1. Make a deci­sion and stick with it — Typ­i­cally, this should be a deci­sion that’s made early, as it helps avoid lots of ques­tions from your guests and pres­sure from those who have par­tic­u­larly pas­sion­ate feel­ings one way or the other.
2. Address your invi­ta­tions appro­pri­ately — If you plan to invite chil­dren, ensure their names are included in the invi­ta­tion. Sim­ply writ­ing, “Mr. and Mrs. Smith and Fam­ily” is rather vague. Sim­i­larly, if you plan to have a kid-free wed­ding, it might be wise to men­tion this explic­itly to avoid any confusion.
3. Pick up the phone — Make a call to those guests who have chil­dren, prefer­ably before the invi­ta­tions are sent out, to make them aware of whether chil­dren are wel­come at the wed­ding or, on the other hand, if it is an adult-only event.
4. Think food — if you intend to make your wed­ding a child-friendly affair, then it is a good idea to have a sep­a­rate kids’ menu. Look at it this way, chil­dren will be hap­pier and, there­fore, less likely to cause a ramble-raising scene if they have food that they’ll enjoy eating.

As with many things in life, there are no hard and fast rules. Whether it is a good idea to have chil­dren at your wed­ding depends upon your per­sonal opin­ion and what kind of cer­e­mony you wish to have. Don’t be pres­sured into making a deci­sion, though. And, even if your choice is unfavorable with some guests, stick to your guns. Remem­ber, it’s your wedding.